Great advice from Nancy -- I'd like to further add... In general, I think your dog is being very dominant and bossy and calling the shots
1) Sounds like he's being a very dominant male. Dogs tend to show dominance over another by placing their heads above the other dog's heads, or touching their ear. I'd recommend some reading on recognizing doggy body language. To the untrained eye, a dog may seem relaxed and calm and quiet, but to someone who had learned the signs, it may be the calm before the storm as the dog is super quiet, stiffened up, and getting ready to attack. You may be seeing the silence and misinterpreting it. Think about consulting a trainer to help you through this process, b/c they may be able to show you signs as they happen for you to understand things more quickly than if you were to just read a book or do online research or watch TV. Neutering will help, but you definitely need MORE help in this area.
2) Besides the leash technique, one other thing we've done is been overly dramatic about not giving him attention when he jumps on us. Pretend you're practicing for an Oscar award for best actor. When we 1st got home from work, it used to be jump jump jump jump jump all over us, pushing us around, etc. We then changed things around and came home to completely ignore him with no eye contact whatsoever. If he jumped on us, we spun around and faced him with our backs and walked away, chin WAY up in the air, arms folded like we were either completely the snottiest people on the face of the planet earth, or in a "I'm not talking to you - hmph!" kind of way. We'd also refuse to budge if he was in our path. Yup - he got pushed aside b/c he was in OUR way. The SECOND his butt hits the floor, we bent down and calmly petted him. So yes, start tapping into your peripheral vision skills
You may find that as soon as you reach down to pet him, he jumps up on you again. Don't give up! Start the process over again. You may need to do this 50 times the first night, and then again the next night, and then the same thing for 2 weeks before he starts to get it. But you can't give up, b/c then you'll have taught the dog that he needs to jump on you 49 times before you bend down to pet him.
He may also need to be demoted if he's been on the couch and bed, etc. Floor only for him if he's not there already. Dogs place a lot of meaning on where they're physically located, and if they're higher than you, or allowed in all the same areas as you on THEIR terms (meaning, they jumped up on the couch when they felt like it and not when you invited them to come -- and inviting them to come up after they've shoved their muzzle under your hand demanding attention, or put their 2 paws up on the couch doesn't count - lol). Dogs don't take it personally when you demote them -- you may think they do, but they adapt very quickly to their new position.
3) Grabbing food off the table. I have a food monger at home, so can empathize. We've learned to keep food away from the edges. Does he actually jump up onto the table, or does he just try to reach for what's on the edges? Snatching food out of your kids' hands....he doesn't respect them. Incorporate your kids into his feeding routine in what Nancy described above, even if that means placing your child in front of you, while you both hold the bowl of food together and go through the "you're not getting the food bowl put down on the ground until you're sitting and calm" exercise. He'll start to see them as being in positions demanding respect, and won't try to take the food away.
All in all, sounds like he needs some lessons in NILIF (nothing in life is free). He has to earn every thing he's getting right now, to help him understand his role in your pack/family. Sit before getting fed, going out the door, getting a pat on the head, etc. Put your foot down about not putting up with bratty behavior, be consistent about it, don't give up, don't get angry - just be firm (just as if you were disciplining your children), and he'll turn around. You had asked if he'll mellow out with time. I would say he would when he's a senior 15 years from now, but it will only get worse if you don't address things now.
Get him more exercised on walks, but don't let him drag you around. The walk becomes a mental exercise instead of just a physical one to try to drain energy. If he's dragging you around, he just went through the exercise of, "Look at what I was able to make my human do and where I was able to make him go and at MY pace for the past hour! Whoo-hoo! I'm totally in charge -- YEAH..."
You'll find that the more you incorporate the idea of you and all members of your family calling the shots and not him (by the way, everyone has to be on the same page to give a consistent message across the board to him -- otherwise, yep - he gets mixed signals), you'll see a ripple effect with some of his behavorial issues. Many times, people don't realize the core of the problem (dominance - bratty behavior, etc.), and think it's just isolated to some of the specific behaviors they see.
Thanks for coming to the board to get some advice BEFORE you're at your wit's end, and GOOD LUCK!
